I want to influence YOU! Yes, that is right. Influence is the capacity to have an effect on the character, development, or behavior of someone. I want to influence all three, — character, development and your behavior, to help you become all you were made for. How can I do that?
I might shout it: I WANT TO INFLUENCE YOU!! But that does no good. So how do I influence you?
Companies spend billions trying to do it every day and night with TV ads. The highlight is coming up on Super Bowl Sunday. I know I watch with an eye for the best ads that day. But throwing money is as ineffective as SHOUTING. I notice for a moment but it will not last.
There seems to be key words that make an action or attitude influential in the positive sense. Here is a list of key words:
When these qualities are present it opens the door for others to receive from you and be willing to embrace what you have to share. I was coaching someone this morning and the subject turned to genuine concern for others and how to express it. While influence was not the topic it will be the result of actions that show genuine concern.
What words describe your interaction with others? Stop and grab a pencil and write down 5 words that describe your motives and attitudes when at work. Be honest. Now make a second list of 5 words that describe your conversations with your spouse. Be honest.
The words you wrote down do influence! The question is what kind of influence. Is it positive or negative influence? Do people want to open up to you or do your words close them down? Are they uplifting or humiliating? Are they culturally inappropriate? (NOTE: You grew up in a family culture, perhaps it was filled with sarcastic bantering. That is your natural culture. Your natural culture may not be appropriate at work or in your marriage.)
I want to influence you! I am influencing you! I trust it is positive!